My God the way some people act on-line sometimes is incredible isn't it. Although my site is still very young, I've already had a similar experience and 3 members have flounced already!!
All this because they wanted their own personal section and I said no. I've created an adult only section but they wanted this and they wanted that and they wanted their own special group, it went on and on, and because they couldn't get their own way all the time, they flounced.
What you have been through is a lot worse though, getting death threats???!! For Gods sake!!
I think you have worked very hard to get this site up and running, good for you. Don't let em beat you. Be better than them and show that they won't win, if that's what they wanted. Silly people.